By Daniil Kharms
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And the main ordinary, not possible, countless and perfect curve may be a circle. (17 July 1931) Daniil Kharms to Aleksandr Vvedensky pricey Aleksandr Ivanovich, i've got heard that you're saving cash and feature already stored thirty-five thousand. What for? Why get a better price? Why no longer percentage what you've with those that don't actually have a completely spare pair of trousers? I suggest, what's funds? i've got studied this question. I own images of the banknotes in widest stream: to the price of a rouble, 3, 4 or even 5 roubles. i've got heard of banknotes of an intrinsic worthy of as much as 30 roubles at a time! yet, as for saving them: what for? good, it's not that i am a collector. i've got consistently despised creditors who amass stamps, feathers, buttons, onions and so forth. they're silly, uninteresting superstitious humans. i do know for instance that what are known as ‘numismatists’ – that’s those that collect cash – have the superstitious behavior of placing them, have you suggestion the place? no longer at the desk, now not in field, yet … on their books! What do you think that of that? while cash will be picked up, taken to a store and exchanged, good … let’s say for soup (that’s a type of food), or for grey-mullet sauce (that’s additionally a type of foodstuff). No, Aleksandr Ivanovich, you're nearly as couth an individual as I, but you get a better price and don’t swap it right into a variety of different issues. Forgive me, expensive Aleksandr Ivanovich, yet that's not extraordinarily shrewdpermanent! You’ve easily long past a bit silly residing available in the market within the provinces. There needs to be not anyone to speak to, even. I’m sending you my photograph so you can be capable not less than to work out ahead of you a smart, cultivated, highbrow, fine face. Your pal Daniil Kharms On Vvedensky (Excerpt from ‘I determined to debris Up the Party’) Now I’ll say a number of phrases approximately Aleksandr Ivanovich. He’s a wind-bag and a card-player. yet what I price him for is his obedience to me. by way of day and by way of evening he dances attendance on me, simply awaiting a touch from me of a few command. i've got purely to proffer this kind of trace and Aleksandr Ivanovich flies just like the wind to fulfil my want. For this i purchased him a few sneakers and stated: – There you're, put on them! – And so he wears them. at any time when Aleksandr Ivanovich arrives on the publishing apartment [Gosizdat], all of them giggle and say to one another that Aleksandr Ivanovich has come for funds. Konstantin Ignat’evich Drevatsky hides less than the desk. I say this in an allegorical feel. greater than whatever, Aleksandr Ivanovich loves macaroni. He constantly eats it with floor rusks and he gobbles up nearly an entire kilo, and even perhaps even more. Having eaten his macaroni, Aleksandr Ivanovich says he feels unwell and lies down at the divan. occasionally the macaroni comes again up. Aleksandr Ivanovich doesn’t consume meat and he doesn’t like ladies. even if occasionally he likes them. it appears even quite often. however the girls whom Aleksandr Ivanovich likes, to my style, are all gruesome, and accordingly we may perhaps ponder that they're now not even ladies in any respect. If I say something, that implies it’s right.